Today I will get a bit personal with you. Growing up I dated boys. I liked them. I always found girls attractive, but never thought more of it. I was engaged to my high school sweetheart. Right after my parents bought my dress I broke off the engagement and soon moved to Texas. Once I settled in I made new friends. I had no family here. As I met new people and had new experiences I found that thought that girls were attractive that I pushed away really was me. I found that I liked women and I felt like me when I was with them.
Then I decided to tell my family. I fully expected a lot of hate, or non-understanding, or to be told to get out. Instead my mom said, “No shit Sherlock.” Now I don’t remember everything that happened in my past but I remember being surprised at my mom’s reaction. After all she was with me when I was trying on wedding dresses and for her to not be surprised just floored me.
Post coming out to my family I started to be more open in my regular life. I didn’t always say I had a girlfriend but once I got to know people I would tell them. And still today when I have a potential new client I do not openly tell them I am married to a woman. I also do not hide it anymore. If someone asks they get the truth.
So what does this have to do with a family law blog? Well maybe nothing, maybe everything. Still today according to http://www.hrc.org/youth-report/view-and-share-statistics 4 out of 10 LGBT youth say that their community is not accepting of them. LGBT individuals are more likely to be assaulted, they get bullied, and they fear the repercussions of coming out.
LGBT individuals are still discriminated against with the law as well. In the Family Law context, two married women or two married men who have children together are not actually both parents of the children unless there is a Court Order or an Adoption (which is a Court Order) that has taken place to ensure that the non-biological parent is considered a parent. You might be thinking, “but I heard we can both be on the birth certificate?” That is correct, but a birth certificate does not establish parentage in Texas so you need that extra step with a Court Order. What’s worse about having to go through this extra step is that if you do not live in a “favorable” county in Texas you are traveling to make this happen (if permitted by the Family Code) or you are crossing your fingers that you have a friendly Judge. While the Obergefell decision gave same sex couples the right to marry it did not change this issue related to children. Until this is changed if you have children and are in a same sex relationship you really need to speak with an Attorney to help ensure that both parents have the same rights under the Texas Family Code. Not doing so can can have the effect of preventing the non-biological parent from seeing the children he/she raised.
LGBT individuals are also discriminated when it comes to name changes and gender changes. I wrote about this the other day here but again, if you want to have this done you will need to jump through some hoops to make it happen.
While things are changing and LGBT individuals are being accepted more and more, there is still discrimination. There is still hate. There is still the thoughts about “conversion therapy.” This discrimination and hate it why I have devoted time in this blog to LGBT issues in the Family Law context. If there are more issues you would me to discuss, please leave me a comment.