When do I get to see my kids?

So you or your spouse filed for divorce. You have a temporary orders hearing set but that hearing is not for another month. Your spouse has the kids and is refusing to let you see them. What do you do?

1. DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT! Document every time you were refused access to the children. Send text messages to your spouse asking to see the kids. Show up to the house to see the kids. But most importantly document each and every time. If you do not document it, then it will be harder for your attorney to use it in Court if needed.
2. Call your attorney and let him/her know what is happening. Sometimes a call to your spouses attorney will resolve the issue. Sometimes a hearing in front of the Judge is necessary. If your attorney does not know of the problem then he/she cannot help you.
3. While there are no orders in place then neither parent has a superior right to the children. You cannot prevent your spouse from seeing the kids, but you can pick them up from school. Do not play the game of she kept them from me so I’m going to keep them from her. Simply go spend time with them.
4. Show up to ALL events that you can.
5. Call, FaceTime, Skype, text with your kids. If you have to call your spouse to talk to them, do that. Keep the phone record log to show how long you were on the phone. Make a chart of the times you are not allowed to speak with them.

I realize NONE of the steps above actually tell you how to get your kids back or give you full possession time with the children. What these steps above do though is give your attorney the ammunition he/she needs in order to help your case.

When going through a divorce or custody battle the number one most important thing is to think of the children first. The second most important thing is documentation so your attorney can assist you.